


Be there for you

by JustAnotherSamlicker



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Car Accidents, F/M, Fluff, Hospital, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Surgery, Wedding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-30
Updated: 2017-07-30
Packaged: 2018-12-08 21:48:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11655387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustAnotherSamlicker/pseuds/JustAnotherSamlicker
Summary: He wanted to make everything alright, but the one time Dean had to rely on him he had let Dean down. Castiel pondered it, his only distraction being his pain and the ever present low hum of the florescent lighting. A tear fell on the white floor. He  wondered if the nurses had called Sam and Jess yet, if they already knew how mournful their wedding might be remembered. If Dean…Cas couldn’t even think about that ‘if’ without his eyes swelling up again.





	Be there for you

Castiel had relied on Dean his whole life. Back when they met in high school Cas had been friends with Sam, best friends actually, not that that had changed in the past few years. But back then it wasn’t as easy as it was now. When Cas came out and most of the school rejected him, or talked about him, it had been Dean that protected him. His reasoning had been that Cas was a friend of Sam’s and he was protecting Sam in extension.   
It wasn’t until they all moved for the same college that Dean on a drunken night admitted how brave he thought Cas had been, and how badly he wished he had been as brave back then. Even later on and even drunker he admitted how little his protection had to do with Sam and just how much it had to do with Cas himself. How he had always longed to know just what it would be to hold Cas’s hand, kiss his lips, call Cas his and to be Cas’s. Not a minute later he found out how all of it would be, and they hadn’t looked back since.   
But now, he wasn’t sure he would be Dean’s much longer. He wanted to make everything alright, but the one time Dean had to rely on him he had let Dean down. Castiel pondered it, his only distraction being his pain and the ever present low hum of the florescent lighting.

Dean had been drinking so Cas was the one that had to drive home after Sam and Jessica’s wedding. The wedding itself had been beautiful. They got married in a little chapel almost hidden in the woods. Their first dance had been magical and afterwards they pulled Dean and Cas both from the crowds. Jessica pulled Dean on the floor, knowing how much he hated dancing, Sam pulled Cas out, knowing how badly he wanted to dance with the reluctant Dean. In the end Dean even smiled as they waltzed as well as they could, Cas leaning his head on Dean’s shoulder and Dean pulling him just a little closer as if to say the rest of the world didn’t matter at that moment it was only them and Dean would always take care of him.   
A tear fell on the white floor. He wondered if the nurses had called Sam and Jess yet, if they already knew how mournful their wedding might be remembered. If Dean…  
Cas couldn’t even think about that ‘if’ without his eyes swelling up again. Through the wetness he saw two figures nearing him. He knew exactly who they were before even wiping their eyes to see them more clear. Poor Jess and Sam, still dressed in their wedding attire. Sam sat down next to Cas and clasped him tightly. They didn’t speak, but rejoiced in pain, while listening to Jess talk to the nurse. Apparently Dean was stable for now, but it all depended on how the surgery would go and on how fast he would wake up. She told her everyday longer it took Dean to wake after the surgery, the chance at full recovery decreased. Jessica nodded softly and thanked her. She turned to her new husband and his best friend. Shen put her hand on Sam’s shoulder and squeezed it for comfort. “I’m so sorry Sam.” She then turned to Cas, his head was split under the bandages, his arm was broken and he had about a million cuts, most of them covered by the hospital gown he was wearing. She had pity in her eyes. Cas kept quiet and so did she, but the genuine concern and pain in her eyes felt almost as comforting as Sam’s arm wrapped around him. They must have been told it was Cas’s fault.   
Cas could feel the guilt take hold of him again, he had been driving them back when in the depth of night, in the middle of the woods a dear crossed the road. Captivated by the headlights in its last moments before Cas hit the brakes hard, but despite his best efforts the collision couldn’t be avoided. From there on it was all a blur to Cas.   
He later heard that their front window had been shattered by the deer flying through it. The rear had hit Cas breaking his arm in the process. A broken piece of glass had nestled itself into Cas’s forehead. Sure he was hurt a lot and it wasn’t great, but he had been lucky. Dean on the other hand head gotten the antlers against his chest and head. Cas had called an ambulance of course, but that was all he had been able to do to. He was begging the unconscious Dean to hold on, promised him they’d be okay.  
\----   
Jessica had brought Sam and Cas a coffee each. She tried to keep it together but she barely could. She barely noticed the way the people stared at her as she walked through the halls of the hospital in her wedding dress. She had too much to deal with to care about that. Her Sam was heartbroken and Cas and Dean, who really felt like family by now had been wounded, possibly deathly in the case of Dean.   
Castiel could see she was having a hard time being the strong one, but they all needed her to, someone should be. “You married a great woman Sam.” Cas told him softly as they watched her talk to a nurse to find out about Dean. The corners of Sam’s lips quirked up, but there was no joy in his eyes. He looked at Cas slightly pained but nodded. “And you’ll marry a great man. I know he will get through this okay?” Sam clasped Cas’s knee as reassurance and Cas nodded. “He’s strong.” Cas agreed, his eyes still fixed on the conversation between Jess and the nurse.   
When Jessica walked back Cas sat up right. “What did she say?” He asked. Jessica let out a sigh of relieve. “He survived the operation.” She told them with a small smile and both guys sounded relieved. Jess’s face tensed up again. “She also told me the chance on full recovery was small. He suffered some brain damage and they don’t know how successful the operation was until he wakes up.” She told them, tears in her eyes. “But he’ll live.”   
Cas didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Dean would live, but possibly without a functioning brain, some almost lifeless thing He and Sam would visit. He looked up at Jessica. “When can I see him?” He asked in a choked quiet voice.   
“In about an hour, they’re finishing up now.” She told him. “You and Sam can both go in now but only one of you can stay.” She explained as the nurse told her. “If he does wake up it has to be in a calm environment.” She continued and Cas nodded. Sam did as well. “We’ll take turns.” He told them and Cas agreed. Jess was glad neither of them fought to see Dean more, since both of the men cared equally. She announce she had to take care of something and left the two, grabbing her phone to cancel their honeymoon to Paris.   
\----  
Sam and Cas both walked into the recovery room. Dean’s bed was the only one of the three that was filled and they were thankful for that, since it meant they had some privacy with him. Cas walked forward first gasping at the sight of the love of his life broken and hurting in the hospital bed. He was slightly reminded of the time a bunch of his old friends had waited for him just outside of the school to beat him up. Sam had found him there, barely able to move, bruises and cuts all over his body. Dean had picked him and Sam up and brought them to Sam and Dean’s home. He got the first aid kid out and slowly but surely treated every cut while pressuring Cas for the names of everyone who had done this. All the people he named had gotten very obvious bruises in the following week and Cas knew it had been Dean.   
But now Dean was lying there, far more broken then Cas had ever been and there was nothing Cas could do. His wounds were treated and if Cas would want to take revenge on the cause it would be on himself, since he had been the one driving. He took Dean’s hand softly and felt a reassuring squeeze from Sam on his shoulder. He smiled over at him and smiled softly. He focussed on Dean again, rubbing the back of his hand with his thumb softly. Cas saw his tears hit the white sheet Dean was lying on. When he squeezed Dean’s hand softly he almost expected Dean to squeeze back, but of course he didn’t.   
Sam said a few words to his brother, how he wasn’t allowed to not pull through this. How he had to fight, how young he was and how much more he could do. If dean could actually hear it, he might not wake up just to spite Sam after that chick-flick moment. Sam just nodded softly before leaving the room. They had agreed he’d be back in 3 hours so he and Jess could change out of their wedding attire and Cas could sleep in the time Sam took over from him.   
Cas, who had been keeping quiet since they walked into the hospital room, now spoke softly. “Dean… I’m so sorry.” He muttered. “You trusted me and I… I’m the reason you’re here…” He told him as he looked at the pale face, resembling the face of the man he loved.   
His other hand stroked Dean’s cheek softly, feeling the soft stubble as he did. He could no longer smell Dean’s normal sent, but instead the penetrating smell of rubbing alcohol took over. The brightness of the florescent lighting made him see spots every time he blinked his tears away. The constant beep of the heart monitor gave him fate as much as it broke him each time he heard.  
It was too much to handle. Cas felt his knees getting weak as he gripped the bed with his free hand to stay upright. He stood there, looking at the man he loved, realizing this would be the toughest thing he would have to go through, and this would be the first time since high-school Dean wouldn’t be there to help him.   
It took over an hour for Cas to get his senses back completely. When he was able to back away from the bed he walked over to the chair, dragging it over to the bed and having one more look at Dean before sitting down and grabbing Dean’s hand again. 

Cas woke up to the sound of the door opening. A nurse came in, looking at Dean, than Cas with big eyes. Cas barely looked at her. He noticed a hand squeezing his. “Dean?” He asked, getting up to see Dean’s eyes half opened and a painful smile on his lips. “Didn’t want to wake you.” Dean muttered, sighing softly.   
Cas kissed Dean’s hand as the nurse gave them a half smile and asked Cas to step out so she could run some tests now that he woke up. Cas kissed the hand again as Dean’s eyes closed again. “I love you.” He muttered as their hands disconnected. “I love you too.”

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know what you think, it would really help me ^^.


End file.
